Stick a Fork in Me CUZ I am DONE

Dear Child who is blowing up my cell phone right now,

I hear you and I know what you want. I bet you are extremely irritated that you cannot reach me and I am not returning your calls. Maybe even feeling a little panicked that I am not jumping at the chance to do yet another favor for you. That I am sitting here eating my lunch and sipping an ice cold coke. What was that? Oh, you are texting me now? Well sorry about your luck. Welcome to MY world, where every time I call or text YOU, I am conveniently ignored until YOU decide you want to call and check in on the phone that I pay for so that I can keep tabs on you. I bet you are really getting pissed now because YOU have cheer practice today and YOU need to come home and shower. Not to mention your poms and everything else you need is here at home. YOU need a ride, probably like NOW right? Well too bad you didn't answer MY calls at 10am when it was convenient for ME to pick you up. It is no longer convenient for me since I have a house full of screaming kids. Oh and I also have an appointment at 2:15 that I am neither changing or missing to bow down to your demands. I am the parent, I am the boss. I have the last word. If you were so clever to figure out that not answering your phone bought you 3 more hours at Lexy's house, you should be clever enough to figure out how to get home.

Love,
Mom