.

Make Her Go Away

2010-12-09T13:26:00.000-05:00

C'mon, do you mean to tell me a ~~woman~~ whore who poses nude was offended by pics of Brett Favre's dingaling? Who saves texts for 3 years? I don't save mine for more than 2 days! And, if she was so allegedly offended, why wait 3 fucking years to complain about it? This is clearly another case of a woman scorned by a famous dude and now she wants her 15 minutes of fame. I saw the pics. I don't know and don't care whose dick it is, this story is so ridiculous. Now he could be suspended by the NFL? THREE years later?? If she complained the day it happened, even if she enjoyed the pics, which we know she did, she might have a case of sexual harassment, but not after 3 years of keeping mum. What is her reason to hang on to them for 3 years? Why is the NFL even humoring this bitch? Give me a break! There has to be a statute of limitations on fuck buddies gone bad.

Incoming Traffic Does NOT Stop

2010-12-04T13:05:00.000-05:00

Any other month of the year, I love that I live 2 minutes from my mall. Don't get me wrong, love the Holidays, love to get out in the snow and shop in the hustle and bustle. I do not, however, love dumbasses who cannot fucking drive. If you don't have a mall in your town, do your Christmas shopping at your local Walmart or Mom & Pop.

Incoming traffic does NOT stop!!! OMG If you have NO stop sign and two large signs on either side of your car when entering the mall parking lot that clearly state "incoming traffic does not stop", then do not fucking stop!! You jack up the whole operation and I don't have the time or patience for your bullshit! While I carry full coverage and would love nothing more than a new car for Christmas, I just don't have the time today. Stay out of Eastgate if you cannot drive!!!!!!

Merry Christmas!!

Sims 2 - The Twelve Pains of Christmas

2010-12-04T13:04:00.000-05:00

CHRISTMAS FROM SHUTTERFLY 2010

2010-11-28T18:56:00.002-05:00

Scarlet Stars Christmas

Get custom photo Christmas cards online at Shutterfly.com.

View the entire collection of cards.

Just say NObama

2010-09-14T12:45:00.000-04:00

After just reading the story on Michelle Obama's recent $500k vacation to Spain and her plans for exotic trips with girlfriends after the New Year AND her plans to redecorate the White House AND their Chicago home, you can imagine the steam rolling out of my ears and the flames shooting out of my eyeballs right now. The New Year plans and redecorating are expected to topple $2million...

As a 99er and Democratic and now FORMER Obama supporter, I was so infuriated that I ran to Twitter and told the big guy that thanks to his wife, he can kiss my ass. He will never get another ounce of support out of me. As much as I cannot stand the Republicans, I am not switching teams. I am simply throwing in the towel and washing my hands on the lot of 'em.

I am a firm believer in not discussing religion and politics but dammit, what a load of shit!! Fuck you, Barack, get your wife under control (something else you have NEVER heard me say to a man). I can't find a job, you can't balls up and force another extension through. I will be homeless soon and your wife will be galavanting around in a tropical paradise... One more FUCK YOU before I go.

I am currently awaiting the helicopters to start swarming my house. Better go put the good lipstick on.

My Alleged Soft Porn Video

2010-08-30T16:11:00.000-04:00

Got Stickam?
I don't. My 14 year old does. I found out as I came up behind her in my bra shirt half on half off in a hurry, asking her a question. Her friend swears she didn't see me. Trust me I am not hard to miss. I am glad she was talking to a girlfriend rather than a boyfriend. Imagine that. On second thought, please don't. *shudders*

Sleeping with the fishes

2010-08-22T22:43:00.000-04:00

So, hubby and I made our annual trek to the movies today. I say annual, because 1. I hate spending that kind of money for a movie and 2. Nothing ever looks that great to pay for that I can watch online or rent from Redbox for $1 in a couple of months.

That being said...my 2010 movie of choice was Piranha 3D. I knew a month ago when I saw the first preview, this was the one for me.

I bitched when I found out that the 3D movies have a surcharge of $2.50, but it is worth every penny! LOVED IT.

Jerry O'Connell was a brilliant choice to play the parodied role of Joe Francis. The 3D penis scene is hilarious.. so are Jerry's interview remarks "the water was very, very cold"

I LOVE cheeseball horror flicks.. the more blood and gore the better!! This definitely fits the bill. I think they succeeded in breaking the record for most boobs and blood in a 3D flick. I could have done without the lesbian underwater ballerinas and all the topless sluts but I guess it wouldn't have been the same without them as the whole Jerry O'Connell storyline was based on him filming his Wild Wild Girls on springbreak at Lake Victoria. Of course the sluts are all dead by the end so all's well that ends well!

Run to your nearest theater! If you like horror, this is a must see!!!!

Bye Bye Bunny Foo Foo

2010-08-20T21:12:00.000-04:00

Kids and Pets... not a great combo. My mother ALWAYS stressed "As long as you have kids or pets, you will never have anything nice" How right was she???? She should know, she had 3 of us kids and we were NEVER petless.

So last September, I broke down from my wonderful world of petlessness and let the kids get a bunny. A dwarf bunny. Spent an assload of money at the petstore on said bunny, food, toys, cage, water bottle, food bowl & bedding. I was the best mom ever, they loved this bunny, were going to take it out to play everyday, feed it, change the cage and if you are a parent, you know all those false promises. In the past year bunny has ONLY been fed, changed and watered by me. Nobody has an interest in letting her out to play. I have had enough.

I put the bunny on Craigslist the other day and today I finally found a ~~sucker~~taker. Had my 14 year old NOT been home today (she is never ever ever home), I swear to you it would have taken her 3 weeks to even notice it was gone, and that would probably be because another kid told her. But she was here, not feeding, cleaning the cage or playing with the bunny, mind you. When I told her I was giving the bunny away, she got all attitude-y with me. Shot me down with looks that could kill. But did she offer to take over the duties? NO..I just suck for giving it away. I am tired of the phony crocodile tears.. been there done that.. I had no intention of changing my bunny cage or cat litter boxes when I was a kid either. But I damn sure put up a good front with tears and all. When she wants to quit cheer, gymnastics, sleepovers, shopping and vacationing with friends THEN we will talk bunnies. Until then, Kasey's diapers are the only shit I plan to clean up and those days are numbered. OVER IT...
Now.. about those puppies...

Stick a Fork in Me CUZ I am DONE

2010-07-29T12:43:00.000-04:00

Dear Child who is blowing up my cell phone right now,

I hear you and I know what you want. I bet you are extremely irritated that you cannot reach me and I am not returning your calls. Maybe even feeling a little panicked that I am not jumping at the chance to do yet another favor for you. That I am sitting here eating my lunch and sipping an ice cold coke. What was that? Oh, you are texting me now? Well sorry about your luck. Welcome to MY world, where every time I call or text YOU, I am conveniently ignored until YOU decide you want to call and check in on the phone that I pay for so that I can keep tabs on you. I bet you are really getting pissed now because YOU have cheer practice today and YOU need to come home and shower. Not to mention your poms and everything else you need is here at home. YOU need a ride, probably like NOW right? Well too bad you didn't answer MY calls at 10am when it was convenient for ME to pick you up. It is no longer convenient for me since I have a house full of screaming kids. Oh and I also have an appointment at 2:15 that I am neither changing or missing to bow down to your demands. I am the parent, I am the boss. I have the last word. If you were so clever to figure out that not answering your phone bought you 3 more hours at Lexy's house, you should be clever enough to figure out how to get home.

Love,
Mom

Father forgive them...

2010-07-28T00:08:00.000-04:00

Landmark - Singles Church Looking for Connections? Try the Landmark Singles Church!
January 13 at 1:57pm

What the hell is this? Well, first off it is a Facebook fan page for a local meat market.. err church. I am sure if you asked the founders they would say, "oh it's a great way to bring more people to church". Um... bullshit! If you are a good Christian who is dedicated to serving the Lord, that alone is your reason to go to church. NOT to get laid. And by their advertisements, getting laid is pretty much guaranteed. I think they have stepped outside the biblical box with this one.
The only reason I know about this place is because a 'friend' joined or 'liked' the page. This particular friend is Pentecostal. She gets a hall pass on days she wants to slut it up and hit the bars or get laid by random guys. The rest of us are going to hell everyday according to her prophecy. She is Pentecostal~~That gives her a Legacy to the Golden Gates. And now she has found a church to support her whoring around that is a sin in anyone else's church or religion.
Welcome to the Den of Iniquity, leave your soul (and morals) at the door.

You Gotta Keep 'em Separated

2010-06-17T17:26:00.003-04:00

Today's rant comes to you courtesy of Celebrities, Athletes and friends/business owners who need some Social Networking 101 lessons.

Seems everyone these days wants to link everything together for you. Enter your status update once and it goes to Twitter, Facebook, Flickr and the like. NO NO a thousand times NO!!!

Each of my personalities needs it own Social Networking site to play on.

Facebook- for friends and family. My kids are my friends and this is a 'nice' place to catch up with old friends and classmates and keep in contact with family members who live in other states and countries. I keep my facebook PG rated and really only use it for updates on my family and to post family pics.

Twitter- this is where I go to play.... where there are no holds barred and no PG ratings. I am the OG of NSFW on Twitter.

Spiffbox- a new site, with a good idea but it doesn't seem to be catching on like originally planned. I stick it out so my daily status update is strictly to get my 10 points 'just in case' it takes off one day like Mr Spiff himself is banking on.

Foursquare- I 'friend' my Twitter followers but do not link this to my Facebook. Why do I trust complete strangers from Twitter to know my whereabouts and not my own damn family and lifelong friends from Facebook? Don't know, that personality is taking a nap right now. I will let you know when she wakes up.

My Blog - Well, basically my blog is just a personal journal, diary whatever the cool kids are calling it these days. Like the name says Raves and Rants. I don't know if anyone reads it, but if so, I hope you like it.

My newest playground is Empire Avenue. Don't know if I would love it so much if I didn't have to weasel a private invite to join. I think the novelty may wear off, but it's a great place for now. I do have this linked to show my Twitter feed but only because it raises my stock and the only people I "know" on there are from Twitter.

With all that being said for myself.... here's a Social Networking tip for the aforementioned friends and business owners.

KEEP 'EM SEPARATED...

If you have a Facebook and Twitter. I do not want to read your same posts on both places. Have a little personality, surely you are not that one dimensional. Don't be lazy.

If you are running a business and have a personal page on your Social sites.. keep those separate too. (Stacy P). I 'fanned' your new business page like you asked but all I get are the same damn posts back to back on my Facebook wall from you because you post the same thing to both. KEEP 'EM SEPARATED! Stacy should update us on what is going on with her family under her account and update us on what is going on in the local music scene on her business account. I don't need all that coming up twice every time she types one post.

Also, if you don't have a separate business and personal account, you should. Absolutely you should. Do you want Client X who 'friended' you on Facebook or follows you on Twitter to see the drunken pics from last weekend or your wife in her bikini on the beach? Didn't think so. Make an account for the business and make an account for YOU but see my advice to Stacy above and everybody shout "KEEP 'EM SEPARATED"

Age DOES a Difference Make

2010-04-22T21:16:00.007-04:00

If I haven't mentioned before, I would highly recommend procreating every six years. You would think, as I did, (ha! thinking is for fools) that having 4 children, all spaced 6 years apart would make things easier because they would already be established with their own interests and friends their own age by the time the next one comes along. Or... like most people, you think I am nuts for starting over again every time I get one in Kindergarten. I didn't plan a space of six years in between. I truly think every time I had one starting school, the snooze on my biological clock went off and my reproductive system woke up and went in to overdrive.

Let me tell you, no matter how far apart they are, they bicker and fight and boss and shove just as much as a pair of "irish twins" would. It doesn't matter that they all have their own interests and friends, they will find a common denominator to kill each other and drive Mom to drink!

But today, I singly and equally fell in love all over again with each of my fab four all within a 20 minute time span.

First, Corey (8) brings his guitar on the back porch and starts strumming away, stopping to ask Jensen (14) if she has any extra "toothpicks" he can use to play with. Well, before I got over my fits of laughter with this, Jensen falls over her own two feet coming back up on the porch and fell into a crumpled ball and we ALL have a good laugh.

Then Kasey (2) picks up the guitar and starts strumming a tune and belting out an impromptu tune, "corey you are my baby, corey you are 'guitarded'" Lord, I thought I couldn't take any more laughter when just then, Jamey (NEWLY 21) comes home to tell me about the time of his life he had at the Cyclones game last night. The seats were right behind the glass, there were lots of fights and hot chicks and oh, it was dollar beer night. (you saw where I mentioned he is NEWLY 21) so he more than enjoyed buying himself some dollar beers at the game. Many, many dollar beers and how he was drunk and texting as he walked into the bathroom and glanced up and thought DAMN there are a lot of stalls in here. Then he looked back up and wondered 'where the hell are the urinals' just in time to see a group of 'hot chicks' putting on their makeup as he said 'oh shit' and found his way back out of the LADIES ROOM!

Maybe life would be easier in my 40s if I had all 4 of them closer together and now they were ALL grown and independent and I wasn't still diapering and chasing a toddler. But I would have missed the best 20 minutes of my life and I would not trade that for anything!!

I love you dorks!!!

Just Say NO to Nickelodeon

2010-04-19T11:27:00.001-04:00

Long time no blog... I am so wrapped up tweeting what I think when I think it these days that I only think in 140 character increments anymore!

But this morning, it would take at least a dozen or more tweets to spill it so here I am.

One of my potty training strategies for my ever so stubborn 2 year old is to always point out how her besties Dora, Diego and Kai Lan are all potty trained big kids and on the rare occasion we do use our princess potty, it is a big ordeal for Kasey to hand me the phone to "call" Dora, Diego and Kai Lan to let them know she is a big kid, too and went potty just like them.

So, imagine my dismay at Nick Jr. this morning when they advertise that it is SUPER BABIES week and the promo has Dora & Diego in diapers and capes flying through the air and the FIRST thing Kasey does is turn to me and say "look, they DO wear diapers" ! Thank you Nick Jr for sending us back to ground zero on potty training. She is never going to stop rubbing this one in my face when it is "potty time". Now I must go find a missing toddler who I am sure is hiding in a corner shitting her diaper because that's how the Super Babies roll!

Liar Liar Pants on Fire

2009-12-18T10:00:00.004-05:00

First off, let me say my prayers and tears go out wholeheartedly to Chris Henry's Mother and Children. This is a horrible underserved tragedy. And I would like to add that I have ALWAYS been a fan of Chris, through the good, the bad and the ugly. He reminds me so much of my own brother and son. Both have had their fair share and then some entanglements with the wrong side of the law over stupid things. Bad choices, maybe, but neither are a bad person. I don't believe Chris was a bad person either. Just young and foolish for a while but lately he had straightened out his life and was headed in the right direction.

Okay.. now enough of the niceties.. let's get to what this is really about. The lying bitch we all now know as the "fiance'". We all know from the first we heard of the "accident" that it was bad news and fishy. Now this morning, ESPN actually gives this murdering bitch the satisfaction that anyone would entertain the notion that what she is suddenly stating is true in any way.

All I heard is the "Eyewitness" statement that Chris' final words were "if you drive away, I will jump off this truck and kill myself". Bitch, who in the HELL is going to believe this bullshit?? NOT me, for one. Chris Henry might have lightened up his thuggish tendencies but there is no way in hell you can convince anyone that he turned into a sniveling, groveling pussy!!! NO WAY. Can you say "CYA". You know damn well that YOU are the cause of his death. I am quite sure your "eyewitness" is a family member who doesn't want to be stuck raising your 3 kids if the truth were to come out. I am sure you were fighting, I am sure he jumped on the back of the truck.. but I also sure he did NOT voluntarily jump off and commit suicide!! You stupid cunt! You drove irratically and I am sure purposely flipped him out. I hope there is a REAL eyewitness to this crime and you get what YOU deserve!

Ho's and Bitches, Bitches and Ho's and a Tiger

2009-12-09T17:09:00.004-05:00

"I'm not a whore. I'm not a tramp. I'm not an escort. I'm not stupid or a bimbo," Uchitel insisted. "I'm very strong. I will survive this. At the same time, I'm vulnerable. I'm not here to make myself into a victim, but I want people to remember I'm human -- there's a whole other side to me. I'm caring and generous and the type of person you'd want to be friends with. People have to give me a chance."

Ok.. so a week ago, this dumb bitch swore up and down she talked to Tiger once or twice at her job and that's it. Then she hired a lawyer to sue everyone who accused her of being said whore. Well well well, boo hoo hoo, yada yada yada.... Now that all the other whores have come crawling out of the woodwork to get their fair claim to fame, suddenly she DID have an affair with Tiger but.... he LOVED her dontcha know? Clearly we all know because somehow, her PRIVATE EMAILS from Tiger have surfaced and all the gossip sites have a copy.. suddenly out of nowhere. Now HOW could this be?? She doesn't want this publicity, yet she is making statements, posing for magazine covers and doing interviews about her affair with Tiger.

So here is the email and slut you can lay on under over or above him because you two assholes deserve each other. I hope your tips can support his broke toothless ass when Elin is through with him! I am going to get on Cafepress.com and create my team Elin tee now. Get it, "tee" like a shirt or Tiger's face when Elin whacked the shit out of him with his golf club...

Emails obtained by In Touch Weekly illustrate an ongoing relationship between Woods and Uchitel, including one from the athlete reading: ""I know it's brutal on you that you can't be with me all the time. I get it ... I finally found someone I connect with, someone I have never found like this. Not even at home. You want someone to witness your life. I want you to lay next to me, lay on me or where ever you want to lay ... Why didn't we find each other years ago. We wouldn't be having this conversation."

I will Support you, Jonathan!

2009-10-08T10:16:00.011-04:00

(Oct. 7) - When it comes to picking out an outfit to wear to school, there's a fine line between self-expression and unnecessary distraction.

One Georgia high school has decided that one of its 16-year-old male students crossed that line, and has asked him to start dressing in a more "manly" fashion, The Atlanta Journal Constitution reports.

Jonathan Escobar had recently transferred to North Cobb High School in Kennesaw, Ga. and immediately caused quite a stir among students and staff with his penchant for wearing wigs, makeup, skinny jeans, vintage tops and women's flats.

Groups of kids gathered around him in the cafeteria, and the school's assistant principal even blamed a fight on Escobar's flamboyant attire.

On his third day at the school, during which Escobar was wearing pink wig, he approached by a school official and told that his choice was to either stop dressing in such a feminine manner or consider home-schooling.

Citing a school dress code that prohibits students from wearing clothing that may "contribute to a disruption of school functions," the school stands by its decision to confront Escobar on his outfits, The Atlanta Journal Constitution says.

Meanwhile, a student group on Facebook called "Support Jonathan" has grown to over 1,000 members. Organizers have printed bright pink T-shirts emblazoned with those words which many students plan to wear to school to show their displeasure, the paper said.

As for Escobar, he sees the school's edict as a an infringement on his creative expression.

"If I can't express myself, I won't go to school," he told the Atlanta Journal Constitution, "I want to get the message out there that because this is who I am, I can't get an education."

Okay... I couldn't find the alleged Support Jonathan group on Facebook so here is my 2 cents that you are so anxiously awaiting...

Ixnay on the Pink Wigs... I have four of our six kids in school right now and no school allows ANY not "normal" colors in the hair of any student. Jensen cannot even clip in a purple extension on football days. So I am cool with that...

NOW... here is what I am soooo NOT cool with:
over 1/2 the students in our Jr and Sr high schools, girls and boys wear the 'skinny' jeans. that is the ONLY jeans Jensen will wear and so do her guy friends. So... that is discrimination. If he cannot wear skinny jeans then either NOBODY wears skinny jeans or all GIRLS must be forced to wear dresses everyday and boys wear pants.

Also, he is wearing flats, he is not wearing david bowie go go boots with sequins and 8 inch platforms!! So... again... fair is fair.. no girls are allowed to wear Chucks or skate shoes to school. I love doc martens myself, but for argument's sake they do look "boyish" so lets ban those if you have a vagina.

As for makeup, well I am still Boy George's #1 fan even though my belief that I could turn him straight if but for just one day, has gone by the wayside so I do not have a problem with a little guyliner on this kid. Or make a specific rule that boys don't wear makeup and girls MUST wear makeup. After all, how do I know that girls with NO makeup at our schools are not all lesbians and maybe I find that disruptive to my children! So... get with the times or REWRITE all the school handbooks to specify what is okay for each sex.

I am personally worried about my kids grades, not their individual styles.
I remember when Rob Wigglesworth wore shorts to school because he said it wasn't fair the girls could wear miniskirts, so why can't boys wear shorts? I was in total agreement because his shorts were down to his knees which is a lot more than I can say for the girls in miniskirts.

As someone who spent many years in Catholic school before escaping to public.. if you want to really make it ALL fair across the board, put everyone in a uniform and when the girls skirts start creeping up the thigh, do what our nuns did..... pull all girls by grade, line them up on their knees and measure each and every one, and if those skirts are more than 4" above the knee, give the slut a whack with the ruler and call her mother and demand she lets that hem down before that tramp is allowed back to school. Do you think I am playing????? I assure you, it happened, all the time, only this tramp was smart enough to know when they got to me, to bow my lower back and stick my ass out so the front of my skirt got miraculously longer.

Word Problems 101

2009-10-05T18:16:00.002-04:00

Pet Bear Kills Pennsylvania WomanBy Janet DiGiacomo, CNN

(Oct. 5) -- A 37-year-old Pennsylvania woman died Sunday after being mauled by her pet black bear, authorities said.

Kelly Ann Walz was attacked when she entered the bear's cage to feed the 350-pound animal and clean its cage, according to Pennsylvania State Police. The bear lived in a 15-by-15-foot steel and concrete enclosure on Walz's property in Ross Township.

The bear wasn't the only unusual animal living on the property, an official with the State Game Commission told CNN affiliate WFMZ-TV. The homeowner had a permit to keep a Bengal tiger and an African lion, and the property routinely passed inspection and had no violations, he said.

Wow... word problems always threw me off as a kid, but I guess I have matured and I think I solved this one right off the bat... ready kids??

PET + BEAR = DUMBASS

Breast Cancer Awareness Month

2009-10-03T18:17:00.001-04:00

We all know October is Breast Cancer Awareness month. If you are in the Tristate area, please get your Pink Hair Extension from Debi @ Noodles Salon on Beechmont. Walk Ins are welcome! For $10, you can look adorable and all proceeds go to Breast Cancer Research! I got mine today! I love it!

On October 18th, from 10-5, Noodles is doing their annual CUTATHON. $10 haircuts and all proceeds to go the American Cancer Society! Please support these ladies and their wonderful effort to find a cure!!

Thank you!

Where's Lardo??

2009-10-02T18:24:00.006-04:00

A month ago, we reported on Glamour's efforts to push the boundaries of accepted beauty norms with a photo shoot for its November issue featuring all plus-sized models -- in the buff.

And now, the picture we've all been waiting for: seven plus-size knockouts -- Crystal Renn, Lizzie Miller, Amy Lemons, Ashley Graham, Kate Dillon, Anansa Sims and Jennie Runk -- all showing off what their mamas gave them.

In the article accompanying the photograph (and yes, all the models actually ate the catered food at the shoot!), Glamour writer Genevieve Field discusses the fashion industry's obsession with weight, explaining that any model over a size 6 is often considered plus-size because she's too big for the designer samples that typically run from a size 0-4.

What's wrong with this picture??? hmmm... wait.... by George, I think I've got it!!

NOBODY in it is plus sized!!!!! Why is it that PLUS SIZE in the "real" world is a size 16 and up but in the "unreal" world of modeling, it's probably a size 6??? I would be thrilled to look like any of these gorgeous women and would not hesitate to put the smack down on anyone that called me fat!

I got it from my Mama... err make that Papa

2009-09-24T15:27:00.002-04:00

It has taken me 24 hours to re-hinge my jaw and I am still (gasp!) at a loss for words on this one.

What would normally constitute an immediate WTF reaction, has left me completely befuddled because we already KNOW what got F*cked!

Mackenzie, if you were molested by your Father and it took all these years for you to come to terms enough to cleanse yourself by letting the world know about it, then I would say awww poor thing, now we know why she had such a screwed up life! But you willingly and consentually boffed your own Dad for 10 years as an adult!!! Many years after your troubles began! The ONLY reason you could possibly want to broadcast this to the entire world at this juncture in your pathetic life as a pock marked crack whore, is to get MONEY and your last 2 minutes of fame you may feel robbed of after being fired from One Day at a Time for being an aforementioned pathetic pock marked crack whore!

Damn girl!! I certainly hope you are NOT getting the attention you are craving at this time! You are a disgusting disgrace!! It makes no difference to me whether it's true or a pile of shit, because just knowing you could speak of such a sick and demented relationship of this nature proves you are the same worthless waste of space you have been for the past 30 years! I used to wish you were MY big sister when I watched your show and was too young to know anything about your drugs and getting fired when it happened.

Poor Chyna and Michelle, now you have dragged them into this sordid tale and out of what I can only assume are normal, healthy lives since TMZ has never informed us otherwise!

Of all people, Oprah should be ashamed of trying to gain sympathy for you!! What is there to sympathize with?? A GROWNASS WOMAN had sex with her dad for TEN years?? I am feeling something, but certainly not pity!

Balls to the Wall

2009-09-13T15:02:00.001-04:00

I am no fan of the Williams sisters, not because I personally don't like them, I just think tennis is boring and I have no interest.

However, I do find this story quite amusing because for the past 2 weeks, Russell Simmons, @unclerush on Twitter, has tweeted many many times on how much he LOVES Serena. How she is this classy woman, intelligent, so well spoken that we must ALL read her blogs and find a new respect for her and all her passion and goodwill. I didn't read the blogs, because like I said before, I have no interest whatsoever in anything she has to say... UNLESS...... she is saying "I want to shove this fucking ball down your throat" That is classic stuff! THAT is reality folks!

It's funny because I have yet to see any tweets from @unclerush today about what a classy lady she is!!

Foo Foo and the Poo Poo

2009-09-11T17:44:00.001-04:00

Funny, when bunny comes out to get some exercise and leaves a little present on the floor, Kasey says "eewwwwww poop" and wouldn't think of touching it. But when brother Jamey comes into the room she says "Mamey, hey Mame, look...shocklate"!!

Do I Read/Watch too much True Crime?

2009-09-11T17:43:00.003-04:00

We were in line at the grocery this afternoon and a man with a bandaged foot and crutches comes up and asks Chuck, "is that your daughter"? He was referring to Kasey, sitting in the cart. Chuck replies, "Yes" and the man goes on about what a beautiful child she is and how he is married but never had kids but has nieces and nephews and we are lucky and then he smiles and says "see ya'll at church Sunday...after your Friday night".

Well I am creeped out at this point and just turned back to my business at hand. Then I start feeling guilty because maybe he is just a nice guy trying to be friendly. Now I really feel like shit...until we were walking out and he was in front of us and his cashier called him back because he FORGOT HIS CRUTCHES!!

Chuck mumbled "hmmm he's not so hurt now" and I felt better about my original gut feeling that he was a TED BUNDY wannabe! I just wanted to get the heck outta dodge and don't think I wasn't using my mom eyes in the back of my head to make sure he wasn't watching or following us! I even took a ridiculous roundabout drive home!!!

That's My Girl!!

2009-09-11T11:41:00.002-04:00

Obviously Kasey will not follow in Corey's sports fanatic footsteps! I hear ya sister! ...SNOOZEVILLE...Take it from mommy.. all you need to know is WAYNE GRETZKY!!! That's all I got & he will always win you the sports pie in Trivial Pursuit!

I am Toddler Hear Me Roar

2009-09-08T12:20:00.003-04:00

Dear Jamey,

You should have learned a lesson from Mommy's previous post about messing with me. What makes you think I will not treat you with equal retaliation as Jensen and Corey?

I have waited very patiently all these months that you have kept me locked out of your room and this morning, you literally left the door of opportunity wide open so I lept at the chance to rip off my diaper and pee on your floor! I did not foresee you slipping in it, which made my revenge all the sweeter, big brother.

Love,

Kasey

Ps...if u tell on me, I will deny it because after all, does this look like the face of an evil scheming baby that would purposely urinate on someone's floor?

I'm All In Bitches!

2009-07-31T16:55:00.007-04:00

So, big Texas Hold 'Em tourney coming up in 2 weeks at my bff's.

Family game, $5 buy in so being the wonderful
parents we are, we are teaching 13 yr old Jensen how to gamble on cards.

As she was playing practice 5 card draw with Chuck this morning, Kasey wanted in so they gave her the jokers to play with and I kept hearing her shout out TWO FIVE TWO FIVE...

I think I need to take an extra $5 to the game!

THE FAMILY THAT GAMBLES

TOGETHER, FILES BANKRUPTCY

TOGETHER!

THROW THE DOG A BONE!

2009-07-30T12:23:00.004-04:00

Poor Michael Vick... had he molested young boys instead of abusing dogs, the world would be his oyster!

Shame, he is a great player and nobody is offering him a job. Come to Cincy, Mike! We gave Chris Henry a second chance! You and Chad would be unstoppable!

STEVE MCNAIR

2009-07-05T13:42:00.011-04:00

So c'mon now... let's be realistic here..

Tell me what part of 36 year old MARRIED man with a 20 year old FEMALE "friend" led you to expect a happy ending???

I have only 3 words for this one....
KARMA
KARMA
KARMA

Of Beer and Boobies

2009-06-13T20:53:00.005-04:00

Ahhh.. from the mouths of babes...

Darling stepdaughter says "hey kim did you know you can get bigger boobs by drinking beer? There is an ingredient in beer that is in breast enlarging pills"

"What did you say Chels? I couldn't hear you over the sound of my beer bottle top popping off"

Don't have to tell me twice..

CHEERS BITCHES!!

Thank the Tmobile gods for unlimited text

2009-03-12T15:21:00.005-04:00

11,000 Text Messages last month.. Yes you read that right folks
E L E V E N T H O U S A N D!!! Can you guess from which of my offspring?? If you guess my 13 year old daughter, you are correct!!! Unbelievable!!!! She will be suffering from Carpal Tunnel before high school at this rate!!

And don't think as a mom I don't check her cell phone and this is what I find whether it's in the inbox or outbox...

Hey
Hey
What's up
Nothin'
Oh
Hey
Hi
Hey
I am bored
Me too
Hey

and you see the pattern here....

POOPS.. I did it again

2009-03-12T12:26:00.003-04:00

So apparently Kasey is sick of Corey and Jensen slamming the bedroom door in her face and not letting her in, so when she saw a window of opportunity the other evening, she jumped on it.. or should I say dumped on it???

They were outside playing baseball and had left the bedroom door open, Kasey was fresh out of the bath and did not have a diaper on yet so she saw that door open and bolted in there and while in there, she was laughing and babbling to herself and laughing some more. I said "what are you doing in there" and she came out, got her pjs on and went right to bed. About 30 mins later, the other kids come in and Jensen screams, "MOOOOM what is on our floor" I said "I don't know" then remembered Kasey and went in and found a lovely puddle on the floor right in front of the tv with some little presents scattered inside!! I guess that was her payback to them!! I am SURE she did that on purpose!!!!

Gimme a G.. G! Gimme an O...O!

2008-10-30T14:27:00.004-04:00

Next up, we have Jensen bringing home TWO prizes this week!

Her Cheer squad took 1st place at Competition and then she won Best Costume at a Halloween party! Not just ANY Halloween party mind you, it was THE party of the year (for as much as 7th graders know about parties!)

So.. props to my homegirl!!!

C'mon Baby Light My Fire

2008-10-30T14:20:00.004-04:00

I am so proud of my kids this week!! First off, we have Jamey, who receieved his letter of acceptance to COLLEGE!!! He is going to be a firefighter! I am so happy he has finally gotten back on the right track with his future!!!

Is this really ALL they've got for news today?

2008-10-17T13:52:00.003-04:00

Angelina Jolie: I Fell in Love With Brad When He Was Still With Jen

Plus, she worries Maddox will find sexy photos of her on the Internet
READ MORE

Really?? This is all they could come up with today?? Who the hell is this news to?? I am pretty sure the whole world remembers the crazy sex they had the entire time they were filming Mr and Mrs Smith and yes, Brad was very much still married!!! I vividly remember reading the stories from the cameramen who heard wild animal sounds coming from the Homewrecker's cabin wondering if she was okay, only to see Brad sneaking out later. I did not click the READ MORE link because what else could she say that we don't already know about her? And as for her kids finding nudie pics on the internet, well ya dumb bitch, don't pose for nudie pics!

HEF NEEDS GLASSES

2008-10-11T09:51:00.011-04:00

HEF'S GIRLS PUT THE JAIL IN JAILBAIT

Hugh Hefner, 82, likes 'em young, blonde ... and bad.Turns out Hef's 19-year-old handpicked twin successors to the throne of Holly, Bridget and Kendra come with a checkered past. Karissa (left) and Kristina Shannon (right) -- who have recently moved into the Playboy Mansion -- were both busted by St. Petersburg, Fla. police for felony aggravated battery back in January. They both received probation and were ordered to pay restitution to the two victims.Karissa also has a misdemeanor battery charge on her record from 2007. Playboy had no comment.

This is what he replaced Holly, Bridget and Kendra with?? Um.. ewwww

But then again, I guess nobody is looking for pretty faces when they pick up a Playboy.

Doogles effin' rocks

2008-10-06T19:47:00.009-04:00

So, I may have created some Clever-ass ecards and submitted them on someecards.com but being not so clever when it comes to HTML, I need my baby bro to help me get the NUMBER ONE sent Halloween card (created by moi) to copy on my blog!!
That's right, NUMERO UNO, bitches!!

Iron Man- this movie sucks balls!

2008-10-05T10:22:00.005-04:00

Rented Iron Man last night. This movie was a new millenium hybrid of Star Wars meets Indiana Jones... oh why am I wasting time here.. It SUCKED ASS! Boring, stupid LONG and my entire bottle of Pinot Grigio did not even give me a buzz because I was so wanting this to end!

Made me want to go buy a VCR and watch Less than Zero... now THAT is some good entertainment from Mr Downey Jr.

Thearlsday is back!

2008-09-26T20:39:00.005-04:00

Last night we welcomed the return of My Name is Earl. Now this is a family fave in the Reilly household. Last season we had some that fell off the Earl wagon because the prison story did drag out and the show lost a lot of it's first season funny, but this season started with the old story line returning and all characters bringing their "A" game.

I laughed my ass off at my fave trailer park tramp with all her colloquial Joyisms and platinum hairpieces! She is absolutely the funniest one on the show. I thought she could never top her best line so far....

"boys go fetch momma's plastic stripper shoes out of the lego box"

But last night I choked on my popcorn when she quipped..

"fe fi fum fo, I smell the stank of a stankass ho"

the writers are back in top form this season! Kudos!

Please pass the Xanax .....

2008-09-22T11:14:00.012-04:00

Means nothing to me

This, on the other hand, You Can't Touch!

Wow! Talk about repressed childhood memories resurfacing and causing a panic attack.... Corey is now bringing home a weekly packet with homework for each night that is due on Friday morning. He brought his first packet home Friday and it took all of 15 minutes for him to complete for the entire week. He only asked for help twice.. with WORD PROBLEMS!!

omg, my heart started racing and all the memories of me sitting at the kitchen table at night in first grade and every damn grade thereafter crying because I could read and read and read that stupid little paragraph a hundred times and have NO clue where to begin. Truly, I would panic and sob hysterically while my parents patiently sat through it with me asking questions, hoping it would suddenly click in my head on it's own rather than just telling me the answers. I give them props on that one because that kind of patience does NOT come naturally to me! Hence, the Xanax comment.

Anyways, the first one was easy, all I had to do was tell him that after he read it, he had to answer the question at the end that the first part of the story told him. He didn't ask again, he wrote, 2+4=6, said "that was easy, is that all I had to do?" and went on to the next day's work. The very last item for the week was yet another word problem, now I read it and thought what the hell is this? You cannot even make an equasion out of it, the answer is just right there. HA!!! It took my first grader to correct me on that because dammit it was a trick question.

Mrs Brown bought 2 new pairs of shoes. How many new shoes does Mrs Brown have?

Uh.. yeah, whatever, If this came instantly to you, then good on ya but for me? My first thought was DUH she's got 2 shoes dummy! Well, I said nothing wondering what Corey would come up with and he said 2 shoes? Then he read it again and said "Oh she has FOUR shoes, right" I said,

"Of course she does, what took you so long to figure that one out genius?"

NO, I did NOT say that, I said "You are the smartest boy alive, that was a trick question and you were too smart to be fooled" (like your old dumb mommy) LOL

So, looks like there won't be any nights of sitting at the kitchen table with my son in tears as he struggles to comprehend word problems!!

Yay for Corey!!!

Sarah Palin

2008-09-22T10:43:00.006-04:00

So I have always followed my Mom's motto.. never discuss Religion or Politics. Well I have heard it many times in many places from many people but my Mom is the first one I heard it from.

Something is irking me and I thought, "hey, this is MY blog, I write it for ME, so I can say whatever I am thinking on any subject here"

Here goes...

I simply think Sarah Palin is a horrible mother and wife and has NO damn business trying to be Vice President of the United States or a BP station. The woman gave birth just months ago to a baby with Down's Syndrome and now has a teen daughter who is pregnant. What the hell?? I am not saying MY daughters would never end up a statistic of teen pregnancy, but my GOD, Sarah, you need to be AT HOME with your poor son who needs your love and attention more than anyone else! Having a pregnant teen at this time just shows us that you are even more irresponsible. Maybe if you spent more time with the family that YOU chose to create, I might have a little respect for you. Right now, it is your HUSBAND who deserves the respect of this country, not you! I think you should be aDAMNshamed of yourself for leaving behind the needs of your young family. Now maybe if you waited another 15 yrs or so, I might have been able to listen to you and take you seriously but right now all I think when I hear your name is what a shitty wife and mother!

I am by NO means saying women should stay at home and not have a career as I am getting ready to go back to school myself for a complete 180 in life. I am saying that Sarah Palin has no business running for Vice President at this time when her infant son and teenage daughter need her undivided attention right now.

There, it has been said and I feel MUCH better getting that off my chest.

So remember, if you happened upon this article, this is MY blog and I have voiced MY thoughts here. I am not starting a fight or debate with anyone and you are welcome to leave your comments behind.

Puffy Mcpuffshirt

2008-09-10T12:57:00.005-04:00

My 16th birthday... looks like I was rockin' the Original Puffy Shirt long before it was a gleam in Seinfeld's eye!

YOU HAD ME AT VAJAYJAY

2008-09-10T07:48:00.007-04:00

"Hey lady, I can see your vajayjay" said the little boy on the street below and I knew Privileged was another hit new show for me! Also having a guest appearance by Debi Mazar didn't hurt. I have been a fan of hers forever now! Another line I loved is "you're not so 'googleable'. " Story of my life, trying to do something so profound that I am googleable! Hell, I have tried every search word I can come up with and even my silly blog is not so googleable!

This show is a GUILTY PLEASURE for sure!! It serves no purpose other than pure dorkafiable entertainment when the kids are in bed and I just want to shut down the brain and relax. It is probably another show I pick up that will not last (ie: DIRT and What about Brian), but for now, it is an awesome time slot for me, following my hyper hour of 90210, after that I need a show to help me wind back down before my beauty slumber!

Pirate Pizazz!

2008-09-05T12:20:00.005-04:00

I need a JOOOOOOOOB!!! It is painfully obvious that I have way too much time on my hands when I am playing "let's dress up the baby like a pirate prostitot"!

But she is the damn cutest lil pirate you ever did see!!!
TMZ will Rue the Day they didn't add my little princess to their baby slideshow!!! I didn't even want the $14!! I wanted to say "I am the first parent PROUD that their kid is featured on TMZ"!!! RUE THE DAY, I say.... arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgh!!

Rah Rah Rah!!

2008-09-05T11:24:00.003-04:00

GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO Trojans!!

Yay for Football Season!!! I remembered everything BUT THE CAMERA for Jensen's first game yesterday!! Only the biggest rivalry of the season!! So.. all I have today is this crappy photo I took with my cell phone.!! She is the adorable hottie back left!! I am so proud of my little Rah Rah!!! She beat out girls that have been cheering for 8 years and also her coach's daughter from last year!! We did kick Amelia's butt even after the bogus foul called that took away one of our boy's touchdowns!! Karma is a bitch, Ref, karma is a bitch!!!

TOLD YA SO.. TOLD YA SO...

2008-09-05T11:11:00.005-04:00

David Duchovny cheated on his wife for years before finally entering a rehab clinic for sex addiction...The X Files star allegedly agreed to seek treatment after heartbroken Tea Leoni discovered his indiscretions and threatened to divorce him. 'He said Tea gave him an ultimatum: Get treatment or our marriage is over,' a source is quoted as telling the National Enquirer. 'She felt it was ruining their marriage and affecting their kids.' The actor has been married to the Deep Impact actress for 11 years, and the couple have a daughter, Madelaine West, nine, and a six-year-old son, Kyd. According to the source, Duchovny has admitted that he is compulsively driven to be unfaithful and finds it impossible to turn down the legions of women who offer themselves to him. Leoni is said to have grown suspicious of her husband's behaviour in recent months and after questioning him on a number of occasions, the 48-year-old finally admitted that he had been cheating on her. Duchovny checked into The Meadows facility in Arizona last week and is currently completing a 35 day course."

Don't like to brag.... oh what the hell.. I LOVE to brag..... soooo... TOLD YA SO>> TOLD YA SO>>>(yes i am doing the 'Will and Grace' dance). I didn't even bat an eye when the reports came out after the original saying he didn't cheat, he was addicted to internet porn because I KNEW he cheated!! Celebrities are sooo transparent!! Tea is a fool to stay with him.... 35 days is going to cure mutiple years of cheating?? Don't think so.. RUN Tea, RUN!!! Junk punch him in the man business and take everything he's got!!!! (I have been dying to use that line since watching 'What happens in Vegas' last weekend, which by the way is a GREAT comedy!) Who are these 'LEGIONS OF SKANKS (oops WOMEN) offering themselves to him?" I would not give that ugly cowlick sporting old man the time of day. I don't care WHO he (thinks) he is!! yuck!!

90210wesome!

2008-09-03T08:37:00.005-04:00

Okay, I will admit it.. I was a HUGE 90210 fan back in the day so curiousity got the better of me as the CW hyped the NEW 90210 all summer and I thought "well, I will watch ONE episode just to say I did" and I am HOOKED!!

They almost lost me in the first few minutes with Lori Laughlin (gag me, terrible actress, never liked her at all) and the all too innocent "new" Brandon and Brenda moving to the Hills of Beverly. I thought this was just too ridiculous for me. I didn't think they deserved to be using the original theme music for this piece. (I now retract that thought)

Well I am thankful now that I did not change the channel during that first commercial break because now we meet drunken granny. She is great, love her!
I am not just saying that because she obviously does not like her daughter in law, Lori Laughlin... lol maybe I am a little!

Then came Kelly Taylor... yay for Kelly!! She's my fave. And it got better and better for the next hour and 45! Also, did anyone else notice the girl reading the school news at the very beginning?? Her last name is Zuckerman! So.. is this Andrea's daughter?? Anyways... I LOVE that Kelly and Brenda are together again, hanging at the Peach Pit with Nat!! LOVE the references to the 90210ld and not so much the spoiled brats on the new1210! Took me until Kelly called Silver her "lil sis" to realize this was baby ERIN SILVER all growed up now!! Funny how she looks just like Valerie! And the previews next week bring back Kelly's mom! I could do without all the teen drama that their world is coming to an end because of a silly text message! Annie with her wide eyed innocent Dorothy from Kansas act is a little over the top for me. And I was so happy that Eden from Nip/Tuck only lasted one season but then she shows up here, still the everpresent slutty bitchy whore she was as Eden, but oh well, guess every show needs one!

Yes, this was a big hit for me, surprise, surprise and I cannot wait to tune in next Tuesday as long as they keep up the OLD storylines and characters because there are enough rich spoiled teeny bopper tv shows on already.... she says as she anxiously awaits the premiere of PRIVILEGED about 2 spoiled teen sisters!!

Sex Addiction is the New Black!

2008-08-31T23:27:00.003-04:00

Oh puuuuuhleeease!!! There is NO such thing as a sex addiction! (see my thoughts on blog below)

But what I do see is a very lucrative career choice for those who specialize in Addictions/Psychology! Up until 3 days ago, I did not even realize you could GET a degree in Addictions?? But you can, and I am seriously thinking about it... enough to at least call my local college that just sent me an enrollment brochure listing all their degree programs and find out whazzzzup with that!

I am hoping my lil 'bro who has a degree in psychology jumps on the bandwagon and cashes in on this wussy excuse for a lameass cheating s.o.b.!! He is on his way back.

You go Dr. Doogles!!!

Celebrity B.S. Translation 101

2008-08-29T14:12:00.005-04:00

LOS ANGELES (Aug. 29) - David Duchovny has entered a rehabilitation facility for sex addiction.

In a statement released Thursday by his lawyer, Stanton Stein, the actor said he did so voluntarily, adding: "I ask for respect and privacy for my wife and children as we deal with this situation as a family."

In the REAL world this translates to:Oh shit!! My wife, Tea Leoni, caught my sorry ass cheating and I better come up with a pathetic ass reason before she takes our 2 kids and HALF of everything I have right on the cusp of my X-Files movie being a huge success!

Oh Dr Drew... say it ain't so

2008-08-26T14:38:00.005-04:00

(Aug. 25) - The California psychiatric center affiliated with pop culture icon Dr. Drew Pinsky is under investigation after three patients died and a 14-year-old was raped there in the past five months, according to media reports.

Pinsky, host of the "Loveline" radio show and the VH-1 show "Celebrity Rehab With Dr. Drew,"' is listed as co-medical director of the chemical dependency unit at the Aurora Las Encinas Hospital. He has said he did not directly treat any of the patients in question.

The hospital boasts $1,400-a-night rooms and spa-like amenities for well-heeled patients suffering from mental illness and substance abuse. Two patients died of overdoses in two days this April and the state Department of Health faulted the hospital for the deaths, according to reports by the Los Angeles Times and ABC News.

Jeffrey Hearn, 28, apparently overdosed on drugs he had been given by another patient, according to the news reports.

Alex Clyburn, 23, still had high levels of narcotics in his system when he checked into the facility, according to the Los Angeles Times. Doctors gave him additional medication and ordered staff to check on him every 15 minutes. He was found dead in his room the next morning, the Times said. The hospital fired a nurse for failing to look in on him.

The third person hanged himself earlier this month, and the next day the 14-year-old girl reported she was raped by a 16-year-old patient near where hospital staff slept, according to the Los Angeles Times.

Pinsky said he had nothing to do with any of the incidents.

"These are not my patients," he told ABCNews.com. "To associate me with these situations is really becoming an egregious problem."

Clyburn's mother said she considered Pinsky responsible.

"I think Dr. Drew is responsible for the quality of care on that unit and he should have known that there needed to be corrections made," Arline Clyburn told ABCNEWS.com. She said she plans to sue the hospital.

Pinsky first gained fame through the radio show "Loveline" in the late 1980s and 1990s and became known for his forthright advice. His new reality television show, based at a recovery facility near Aurora Las Encinas, has drawn fire from those who say he is unfairly taking advantage of patients as well as pushing the boundaries of what's acceptable for a reality television show.

The hospital featured Pinsky's photo on its Web site -- the only doctor so featured -- but soon after news of the deaths circulated the photo was removed.

The federal government threatened to halt funding for the hospital four years ago when two patients died. One drowned, and the other died after two days in leg restraints. He was supposed to be restrained for only 3 1/2 hours, according to news reports.

After the recent incidents a subsidiary of the nation's second-largest health insurer, UnitedHealth Group, has halted referrals to he hospital as the insurance company conducts its own investigation into the recent deaths.

Boy oh Boy!! I sure do LOVE me some Dr. Drew and have been counting the days to the new season of Celebrity Rehab on VH-1!!!

Now really, I have no idea if he is at fault or not but these people were seriously screwed up to land at this facility in the first place so they should be under ROUND THE CLOCK babysitting and under lockdown at certain times. Also patients should be searched inside and out LITERALLY for contraband. When I watched the first season of Celeb Rehab they did that. They wouldn't even let Mary Carey (VERY UNDERSTANDABLY) bring her porn movies or toys in with her! How did these NON celebrities smuggle all these drugs in??? And if it was from visitors, you should not be allowed unsupervised visits!!! C'mon folks!! I have NO medical background and could have done a better job at running the facility! I really hope the good Doctor is NOT at fault for any of these tragic deaths!!!

Cell Hell

2008-08-26T12:23:00.002-04:00

We gave Corey Jamey's old prepay cellphone. Of course we are NOT putting minutes on it for a six year old but he just likes charging it up and playing all the ringtones on it and taking pictures, he follows us around saying "work it for me, i am the paparazzi" (a chip off the old block, or what?? LOL)

Anyways..... he was mad this morning because I wouldn't let him carry it to school in his bookbag. He tried to argue he needed it on the bus to check the time!! He is hiLARious for a six year old!!!!

Wham Bam Thank You Pam

2008-08-26T10:20:00.002-04:00

First let me say to anyone who was googling pics of Pam Anderson and reached this, SORRY! I am sure this was not the "pam pic" you were looking for!

This little blog is to pay my homage to Pam Anderson. I think she gets a pretty bum rap that is not always deserved. I can honestly say that I always knew WHO she was and WHAT negative things I read about her in the tabloids but I really never thought anything other than "my god, how does one woman look so incredibly gorgeous all the time". Wasn't a fan, wasn't a hater, really didn't phase me one way or the other until one night when I went to bed early (again, sorry if this is not heading it the direction you are hoping for) to read my monthly issue of Jane Magazine. I get about 1/3 of the way thru and turn the page and there's Pam and a little blurb from Jane saying that from now on Pam will write a monthly article for them. I thought, oh no, what has Jane Magazine come to letting this woman write an article? Can she even put a sentence together.... I apologize profusely, Pam, for letting the media put a negative image in my mind from the get go with you!

I read her article and I was floored. I read it again and still in shock! I still kinda wondered if she put that together herself but I knew she did. And I thought to myself, this is a SMART woman, why does she make poor choices in men all the time? She is a wonderful, loving mother to her sons and I could clearly see month after month of flipping straight to her journal page, that those boys are her everything! She wrote every sentence straight from the heart whether she was talking about her boys, a failed relationship or her Hepatitis. I have nothing but respect for her and still think she is the sexiest woman alive no doubt about it!

It makes me wonder how she is so smart and yet still makes dumb decisions when it comes to men??? None of my business but I have to put my 2 cents in and say that I wish she would just stay with Tommy because personally, from the outside looking in, when they are together, they are both beaming with happiness and for better or worse, I think they are soulmates and will never find a love more powerful with anyone else.
I really don't see her boys growing up to be thugs or fucked up delinquents like many others in Hollywood today.

So, here's to you, Pam!!

My homework's done, can I go out to play?

2008-08-26T08:25:00.003-04:00

So my middle two, Jensen and Corey, went back to school yesterday. Corey is in first grade this year so he goes a full day. I ran a couple of errands with the baby and came home to a QUIET house, no fighting, no tvs blaring no kids running in and out and making a mess in the kitchen all day... aahhhhh what better break could a mom ask for.......

AND THEN THEY CAME BACK... and MY homework began!! Why oh why do I have to fill out the same endless stack of paperwork for each child year after year after year when nothing has changed from last May when they left the SAME schools??? Do they throw away the student files on the last day of school?? I think they should have the info already there and even the papers I filled out yesterday asked for the SAME INFO over and over just on different colored copy paper and sometimes on a cutesy index card. o m g!!! I think I have carpal tunnel from all that writing!!! I don't write anymore, I TYPE!! Doesn't everyone type these days?? We used to get in trouble for passing notes in school, not anymore.. now they get their cell phones confiscated for texting in class! I think if your information- ie: address or phone.. has not changed since the end of last school year, you should NOT have to continue to fill out all new paperwork each August. I asked my best friend how she can stand it when she has all four of hers in school at the same time. She said "I locked myself upstairs and said NOBODY BOTHER me, and 2.5 hours later I emerged with a headache!"

I am glad mine are spaced so that I will never have more than 2 in school at the same time!!!! My biological clock only set off the alarm when my "baby du jour" was starting kindergarten!! That alarm will have to stay on permanent snooze this time as I cannot fathom it ringing successfully when Kasey starts school in five years and I am well..... let's just say I won't be 29 any longer!!!

OH MYchael!!

2008-08-25T20:36:00.003-04:00

'Nuff said

Apparently in Ohio, we like our babies WELL DONE

2008-08-21T09:37:00.002-04:00

Baby Found Dead At Cincinnati Christian University

Police cruiser blocks driveway on the Price Hill campus.

Cincinnati police are investigating the death of an 11-month-old baby girl found inside a minivan in Price Hill around 4:30 p.m. Wednesday afternoon. (DEJA VU for us in Cincy!)

Police say the baby's mother, Dr. Jodie Edwards, left the infant girl inside the van in a parking lot on the campus of Cincinnati Christian University. ( oh obvioulsy it was an ACCIDENT if she teaches at the CHRISTIAN UNIVERSITY, right?)
Police say the baby was discovered by her mother as she was leaving work this afternoon.

Earlier investigators had said they believed the girl had been left inside the van for several hours.

Police now say the child was still in her car seat when her mother reported for work at 8:30 a.m. Wednesday morning.

9News was told by a school official that Edwards had a recent change in her daycare routine and had not realized her daughter was still in the van when she parked it.

Edwards is a faculty member at Cincinnati Christian University where she teaches counseling.

9News was told the first day back for the school's faculty members was last Friday.

This Saturday marks the first anniversary of a tragedy reminiscent of what happened this afternoon at Cincinnati Christian University.

Former assistant principal Brenda Nesselroad-Slaby's two-year old daughter, Cecilia Slaby, died after being trapped for eight-hours inside a hot SUV outside Glen Este Middle School.

The temperature that day was up to 100 degrees Farenheit.

Clermont County prosecutors decided not to prosecute Nesselroad-Slaby.

The West Clermont school board agreed to allowing her to retire on disability, or pay her salary into next year if that failed. (makes me so proud that she was my daughter's vice principal and jealous that I can't get a job with those kind of benefits! kill your baby and get to leave your job and continue to get paid for a year)
A prayer vigil is being planned following Wednesday's tragedy.

If Wednesday's death is ruled hyperthermia it will be the first child death of its kind in Ohio this year.

But it would also be the 29th in the United States this year.

(I would like a list of all these "accidental" deaths from other states and to see if THOSE parents all walked away scott free!)

I am beyond outraged after staying up to watch the news last night. Her coworkers all said the same thing 'SHE HAD A CHANGE IN HER ROUTINE THAT'S WHY IT HAPPENED' OMFG!!! Those are the EXACT words of excuse that Brenda Slaby used one year ago. She changed her routine! I have FOUR kids going in all different directions all year long, my routine "CHANGES" all the time and I can assure you I have never and never would "FORGET" one of them and I can't say I know anyone with kids that ever has! It makes me sick!! Another wealthy woman will walk away free from killing a baby!!! If "go for the jugular Joe" lets her off it's only because he HAS to because they set the precedent for this with Brenda Slaby! I guess anyone wanting to get rid of their kids should come to Ohio where it's OK to cook your baby alive, but make sure you don't duct tape them and leave them in a closet, because apparently THAT is taking it a little too far! (google marcus fiesel... another fine family here in Shitcinnati)

Another Day .... Another Dollar??

2008-08-10T20:09:00.002-04:00

'Dollar Menu' May Soon Be '$1.29 Menu'
Reuters
posted: 3 DAYS 2 HOURS AGO
BEIJING (Aug. 7) - McDonald's Corp. said on Thursday it was considering further price increases, but would do nothing that slowed customer traffic into its global network of stores.

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The world's largest restaurant chain posted second-quarter profit that beat expectations on strong international sales, but said to offset mounting commodity pressures it was looking at changes to the popular Dollar Menu, which lures value diners.

"I don't think customers care that much if the price moves slightly away from a dollar," Chief Executive Jim Skinner told Reuters in an interview on the sidelines of an event to mark its sponsorship of the Olympics. "It will always be the best value around," he said.

Much speculation swirls around the fate of the Dollar Menu double cheeseburger, which McDonald's has tested in certain markets at prices up to $1.29.
Skinner said McDonald's might adjust some prices in the menu, but that it would not abandon the Dollar Menu because it was a key part of bringing customers into its stores.

"We won't get rid of the Dollar Menu ... we must maintain traffic," Skinner said.
During the first half of the year, McDonald's raised prices in the United States by 4 percent and prices across Europe were boosted by 2 percent to 4 percent.
But the price rise accounted for just under half of the average annual gain in commodity prices that McDonald's faces.

While reducing costs and increasing efficiency are a part of McDonald's everyday operations, the company would not scale back its expansion.

Is it just ME?? When I hit the DOLLAR store or the DOLLAR menu at a fast food joint, I only expect to pay ONE DOLLAR for each item I purchase!
"I don't think customers care that much if the price moves slightly away from a dollar,"

THIS customer sure does!!

Salute to the Olympics

2008-08-07T12:09:00.002-04:00

SNAKES ALIVE!!

2008-08-05T13:06:00.001-04:00

So... since moving here in February, I have seen more "freaks of nature" than living for five years with our house backing up to the Cincy Nature Center!!! We have been swarmed by bats over our bonfire, cicadas, which are STILL hatching daily and SNAKES!! Not to mention the undergroud lair of a beehive right outside our bedroom window. We have blasted, smoked, tried to poison, flood and who knows what else to them and they are still there!

Just this morning, as the mailwoman passed, I go out and see yet another snake lying in the rain in front of my mailbox. Needless to say.. the mail is still in the box! I would rather see a snake than a bug anytime, but I didn't think stepping over his head to get into the mailbox would be one of my smarter moves!

Houston.... we have a poo flinger!

2008-08-05T09:37:00.004-04:00

o m g!!!!!!

I hear Kasey crying this morning so i go get her some milk, go into her room and it was still a little dark and i see a big dark "thing" on the floor, at first i panic thinking it is a huge bug and it's a big turd!!! GROSS!!! oh, that was NOTHING!! I look in the crib.. the diaper is off, the sheets have dingleberrys and poop smears on them and she has it on her hands! NOW I freak out wondering if she ate it!! I wipe her up, let her have her cup, change the sheets. When she was finished, I was holding her on the couch and telling her we don't have POO FLINGERS in this family and I see poop smeared on her elbow, I grossed out and said "ok, bathtime" and she looks up at me and has TWO turds tangled in her bangs smashed to her forehead like frankenstein bolts!!! I am laughing so hard right now I am typing this blindly! I could NOT pull the turds out and put her in the tub and there was another one in the back of her hair! I ALMOST cut her hair to get them out but I finally got them and scrubbed her hair about 4 times!!!! It was soo gross!!! NONE of my kids ever did this before!!!